When the blinds open
My fears only deepen
For I am not in a heaven,
But in a dark raven.
Why o why do I feel,
With every step I deal,
As my fate would unveil,
My wounds are never to heal?
Is this something I have to pay?
Why don't someone just say!!
Where do my answeres lay?
Oh Please! Before I go far... Far away....
Tell me, whom did I wrong?
Around me, why do sorrows throng?
A hand, a hug, a word I long...
Or... Is this where I really belong?
Ah I forget, who wants to hear,
The cribbing of just a man, mere
And there is nobody near.
Ah! This life is nothing but a failure.
Allow me to go back in time
To heal the wounds I burnt with lime,
Ring the bells and chyme,
As penance for sins and my crime.
Life has taken me to this road,
Neither a hut nor an abode,
No longer, these can I afford,
Its too late to turn back the mode....
Why should I whine or weep?
So what if I am atop a steep?
Now, ha! No promise to keep,
All I have is just a leap!
With a smile I hug what I get,
Everything is so very set,
I'm sure there'll be a fete,
To celebrate my end, the ultimate.
Aah! I am free finally
No worry, no pain, falling freely
As I go down this deep valley,
Can't wait... For the end re-ally....
PS: I don't know why I wrote this.
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Well, if you want to read the little joys and sorrows of a young Engineer, who is juggling with every faculty he possesses, to achieve one plain and neat goal- SURVIVAL, then this is the place... This is the place where the hotICE pours himself out... The Melting Pot of ICE
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22 comments:
Intense thoughts these...
Dyu really think there's an end?
btw, nicely written. Take care man
Deep within, every human has a feeling..he knows that there is an end he has to face. Besides, there is no way to turn back time....to change the past or to run away from the end...
But there are only few like u who r able to pen down these complicated emotions so easily! Cool! Btw...r u really waiting for the end?...u must be crazy!!!
Hmmm...it's been penned down really well..I'm sure there are many people out there who can relate with u on this.. But just like u put it.. i can't understand why u wrote it.. !!
Mayb u can say ther was no bgrnd behind all those.. but its just not an abstract feeling..
I too feel the same sometimes.. Its just the feeling of missing ur frnds and entering into a new wrld expecting somethin gr8 4rm u..
Just make sure u keep in touch with ur true frnds.. am sure things will fall back in track..
thats really thought provoking.. and dunno why i can relate myself with it.. the transient feelings that one engulfs oneself at the encounter of every setback and these are the set of lines that haunt our thoughts...perhaps we cling to counting our flaws and forget to pat at the great virtues we possess that distinguishes us .. but then time takes on and all flips to nolmalcy until another such tide takes on... great alfi!!!
for those who dont know you....well written. out of your context though..
all i have to say is stop worrying and open your eyes.. look at everything around and you will realise that you are one of the luckiest human beings alive!!!
definitely, definitely, there must not be an end to this!!!
( you know what i mean....kulfi...)
Nicely written! Good work Alfi :) Keep writing more!!
My god!! u r only 18 and can come up with so tense as this!
Impressive!
Rock on!
ok.. this is gonna be fun!
@ Mirage : do I think there is an end? well, depends on what you are talking about. A man's life might end one day, but he lives on for eternity; call it immmortal, memories or for all you care, afterlife.
@ Noni : you've always been a dear friend who flatters me a lot... thank you this time too. and yeah, I guess everyone knows there is an end to his/her life; just that, some forget while others live in fear of it.
@ Anonymous aka JAMmy : thank you boss! how do you manage to praise me even while we were having our troubled session;-)
@ shagan : now heres a guy whose given a totally different dimension to an otherwise thoughtless piece of work;-) Maybe, there is an element of truth in loneliness being a reason for this work, considering I penned it down at 1:30am, when I was alone in my house and folks were in India.
@ shilpi : thank you shilpi for officially "great"ing me. and on your view, I think you have a very good point here. More often than no, when one faces a big blow, he/she tends to forget what he/she has gained till that moment. Kinda skewed psychi
@ Anonymous aka Deepthy : thanks a lot darling! for you have made my day, finally gracing this humble being's literary dumpyard. and this comment is extremely personal and close to my heart. and you know more than anyone why;-)
@ IMM : Thanks a bunch IMM. Been a while since you've been around here. Now that you're back, I'm happy. Really good to know you appreciated this effort. And yeah, can't assure you that I'll keep writing, thanks to best friend for life, Mr Lethargy;-)
@ Heena ... : Ok. now this is weird! SAME poem, SAME thoughts, SAME LINES! well, lets have a deal....... lets just call it coincidence and you drop the charges of plagiary on me;-) he he he.. thank you Heena, nice to see you back here. and yeah, I'm waiting to read your version (now that I can claim that you copied from me "devilish smile he he he" ) jus kidding;-)
@ Neha : thank you Neha for dropping by. very happy to learn that you are impressed. Just one point.... I love to stay young, but lets face it.. I'm 22, not 18;-)
As far as I remember - this is the first time I've read a poetry from you. Very poignant.. Do write more.
nice attempt indeed!
beautiful! ull be fine.. its just a phase..
i tagged u ages back! totally forgot bout it.thx for droppin by..keep writing..
That's depressingly beautiful. Depression is sometimes more beautiful than any other phase of life, isn't it? Sometimes, the most happiest of times in your life can make up for some of the most depressing memories in your life and vice-versa.
Am sure you see sense in it, don't you?
And that piece of poetry made more sense than most pieces that I have stumbled across.
Believe me.
"Why don't someone just say!!" .. what kind of ghetto english is that? poetic ghetto license? :)
but excellently written otherwise.. keep it up..
wow! that was so good!!
Dada... wat is goin on..? Hmmm... how come you came up with this... so un'alfi'... but nice... I lyk... also...Howz it feel to be back frm the dead??? Ur one lucky bastard yknow... or maybe someone out there praying really hard fer Ya...
take care man...
Ramadan Kareem....:D:D
Ajwad
Hugs from Kerala....
:)
Hey! Phir se ruk gaye!
Again "gayab" ? Chalo koi nahi .. Eid mubarak!
Hey Alfi! Eid Mubarak!! Where are you? No new posts from your side :(
Oye! Kithe ho Alfi mian?...itne bz ho tusi??
Was that actually "the end" of your blog?
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